My Legacy

It’s been a long while since I’ve posted anything of substance.  I’ve not had much to say these days — so I went back into my archives and found this draft post — from October 21, 2013.  I’ve not edited it at all. I figured it was best to just post it — grammar/spelling warts and all. So here goes………….

Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about my legacy.

Legacy is defined as “something transmitted by or received from an ancestor or predecessor or from the past”.

For me, as you most of you know, at this point, it’s very unlikely that I’ll have my own biological children. If you’ve been following my blog, you know I’ve struggled with infertility and then cancer struck. After aggressive chemo nuked my entire body, including my ovaries, there’s little possibility that I can use my own eggs for a pregnancy. Hell, I’m still technically in menopause and have no clue if I’ll ever get my period back (TMI? Don’t read this blog then!).

But, all of that said, I still think about my legacy.  When Paul and I were picking our egg donor, her family health history was very important to us. We looked for red flags, like cancer, heart disease, metal instability etc. Obviously, you don’t WANT any of that if you can avoid it. Thankfully, our donor and her family, on paper, lacked those “bad” traits. Though I’m no dummy, that shit can hit her family tomorrow. I’m living proof of that.

Now, that the dust has settled with my own treatment, I realize that my own family will have to grapple with my diagnosis as it relates to themselves and their own families.  My thoughts immediately go to my brother Bob’s daughters.  Will my darling nieces have to get the BRCA gene test? Since I was BRCA negative, will that test and it’s results even be meaningful if they do have it? Will Bob and Sarah worry every day about their daughters’ susceptibility to cancer given that their paternal aunt got it?

I also think about my maternal cousins; but I’m less worried about them as they’re grown women who can make sound decisions for themselves. What about my first cousins’ children? I realize that’s a bit far removed, but I still think about it.

Finally, we all know that breast cancer doesn’t only impact women – men can get it too. For some reason, I feel cavalier on this front. I feel sure that no men in my family will be impacted. But that’s probably stupid of me. So to my brothers and my male cousins — FEEL YOUR BOOBIES. Sorry, it is what it is.

Ugh. I’ve been so busy thinking about me and getting through this ordeal. I didn’t stop to think what sort of reality and worry my DX may have wrought on my family and extended family.

My only hope is that this starts and ends with me. That my body simply went haywire and that’s the end of it.

Geez, reality does bite.

Drum Roll Please

I met Giuliana Rancic today! Yahoo!

The Bright Pink tea and fashion show were great. Paul was a little bit sad I dragged him along — he was one of the only men there. He’s such a good sport!

At the end of the event, we hopped into the receiving line, and before I knew it, I was talking to Giuliana!

Most people just walked up to her and got their picture taken, but not me, oh heck no. I started chatting her up! We talked about my journey and she was really warm and supportive. After a few minutes, we hugged and then Paul and I were off.

It was a fantastic day. I loved getting to meet Giuliana in person (it’s also worth noting that I totally stalked Sarah Knight but was too embarrassed to go ask her for a picture — it’s a little sad that I’m also UHbsessed with G’s assistant).

I am so happy right now! Enjoy the slideshow below!

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The Obsession Continues

Shadin and I had a wonderful day together. We lunched at the Rotunda at NM,


Then walked over to the Westfield, where we both scored some pretty ah-maze Tory Burch diddies. Just say YES to friends and family and a little good ‘ole haggling! Hmm hmm, we haggled for additional discounts for having to buy the floor samples. None of that is beneath us 🙂

When we walked into Bloomies, we saw a picture of Giuliani Rancic. I didn’t think much of it. it being October and all. But I decided to investigate further. Turns out, my BFF Giuliana will be here in SF tomorrow hosting a BCA event with Bright Pink (the non-profit she partners with).


Yup, I did it. I bought Paul and I tickets. This is the first breast cancer non-profit I’ve decided to support since my DX. It was a big decision. But I know Giuliani and Lindsay Avner will put our $100 to good use making a BC survivors wish come true.

Fingers crossed we actually get to meet Giuliana tomorrow. OH EM GEE, OMG, OMG……

I feel like a little kid the night before school. What on earth should I wear????