So, I’ve been thinking about it — in life, we all have choices. Well, obviously some are made for us — like getting cancer, Of course, I wouldn’t have chosen that for myself. Nor would I have chosen infertility — but that crap just happened. The choices I’m talking about are what we do from there. How we, nee, I handle stuff like this.  I could choose to curl up and cry forever or face it head on with a positive attitude. To be honest, my tactic so far is a bit of both. I am a strong believer in listening to your body — so when I feel like letting the waterworks out — boy, do I ever. I even indulge in sad-ass movies like “Marley and Me” to really get a good, good cathartic cry in — but then, I move on. I choose to try to be happy and look on the bright side. As much shit as we’ve been up against the past few years — I still believe EVERYTHING happens for a reason.  And, since my diagnosis, I’ve re-connected with so many old friends and become closer to so many more current friends — it’s truly been an amazing experience! So that’s been the bright side thus far!

Anyhoo — the point of this post is that when it comes to choices, as a Buffalo Bills fan — one must *really* choose to be a fan. Because the team has not been good since the early 90’s (for real) and Paul and I CHOOSE not to be band wagon fans. We are all in. Which is a really difficult thing to do, especially out here in California.  I did the math this year, and I’ve been going to the Bills-Backer Bar (called the Northstar in North Beach) for NINE years! Holy crapazoids, that’s a LONG time. In any case, the point is, we stick with the Bills through thick and thin and a lot of people know that about us. A few years ago when we were home in Buffalo for Xmas, we went to a Bills game with one of Paul’s best friends and cousin Jeremy and his wife Sally. We had a blast! Until we all got the stomach flu and puked for like two days straight! lol! That’s when I first got introduced to zophran (sp?) and thankfully, I know it REALLY works as an anti-nausea med! yay! I for sure will be getting that stuff during chemo!

In any case, back to the story, Jeremy and Sally are our very good family — and the other day I got a package from them. I tore it open with the reckless abandon of a 3 year old! And in it, HOLY SHIT, was a girls-sized number 12 Jim Kelly Jersey (from the early 90 with the awesome bright blue colors — those of you from the ruff buff know what I’m talkin’ about and know how hard it is to get this jersey anymore!). If that was not cool as shit enough, I turned the jersey around and it was friggin’ personally signed by Jim Kelly to me (Kicker, take that! (inside joke))! See pic below! DIE two times over!

Jersey signed by Jim Kelly!!! DIE

SO, the point of this post was “choices”. We all have them to make. Me, I choose to view all this cancer stuff as an opportunity for me to reconnect with friends and to share my story with those about to walk the same path as me and to offer my insight. I also choose to love the Bills no matter what! hahahaha. The latter might seem like a small choice to some — but if you are from Buffalo, it’s nearly as serious as cancer! lol.

My heartfelt thanks go out to Sally and Jeremy for arranging for the jersey. It was the best thing in the world and I wore it with pride today as we got our asses kicked by the Colts!  Below is a short slide show of some of my peeps from the Northstar. Enjoy and mucho love to allof you out there bothering to read this!


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